My meeting with Marian Keyes
Marion Keyes, the Irish author came for a treatment in Dublin, Ireland and this was in Image magazine. Then it ended up in her book
"Postcards from the Bed" MArain Keyes pp52-54
The following day, I had an appointment at the Harvest Moon
Centre with Doctor Yvonne Murphy, who works in tandem
with Danielle. She's a fully qualified chiropractor of the
conventional medicine kind, but with a difference. She doesn't
just fix your gammy back, she 'realigns' your spirit as well.
Most of us are 'out of balance' - our male / female sides are
skewed or our right brain/ left brain balance is off, and once
we're back in balance, it'll 'heal sexuality and bring heightened
awareness and awake mind, body and spirit' .
The Harvest Moon Centre - like the place the night
before - was full of surprisingly normal-looking people: a
blonde woman in a black trouser-suit with an umbrella was
emerging from having her chakras realigned, a man with the
short, tight curls and meaty build of a rugby player was off to
the flotation tank for a session. He jerked his thumb towards
the tank and casually asked the receptionist, 'I'll just hop in,
will Ir'
Yvonne took me into a therapy room and within seconds
she had discovered the banjaxed bit of my neck. The top of
my spine points slightly to the right and I had always thought
it was that way because I'd got mild whiplash while on a
rollercoaster in Alton Towers. But Yvonne's assessment of it
was that my right-brain was working overtime and my leftbrain
was basically sitting around, slumped in front of the
telly, watching Oprah.
She says that our back problems are a map to our emotional
and spiritual states. Men mostly come to her with lower-back
problems, which means their base chakra - which correlates
Does My Base Chakra Look Big in This?
to survival issues like careers and finances - is giving them
gyp.
Her language, like Danielle's, is mystical - the chakra
hit-rate per sentence is high. If you were in any way sceptical
you might be moved to be scornful and Yvonne is wryly
aware that this is the case. Not that she seems to care - if you
could bottle her serenity you'd' really be on to something.
Besides, as she numbers hard-nosed business people among
her clientele, she can afford to ignore the sceptics. Accountants
and lawyers come to her to get their analytical left-brain to
stop bullying the artistic right-brain. Even more intriguingly,
greyhound and racehorse owners employ her to work on their
animals. In fact, she treats more racehorses than she does
human beings! And somehow I can't imagine the horsey set
standing for any nonsense if they weren't getting results.
Up on the couch I clambered. At the best of times I'm a
massage junkie - call it hands-on healing ( Yvonne does) or call
it massage, but I love it. With her focus on my neck, skull, face
and spine, she twiddled and rubbed me, and it was blissful.
After about twenty minutes ofpressure, she told me that my
right-brain and left-brain were more in alignment. Honesty
compels me to admit that I didn' t feel anything that I might
describe as a shift, but I didn't care. I felt so good I was ·
floating, and my only regret was that I hadn't been more out
of alignment to begin with, because the treatment would have
gone on for longer.
When I got home, Himself was waiting for me with eager
anticipation.
Postcards from the Bed
'Well?' he asked hopefully. 'Is it all systems go?'
I'd ordered him to be on stand-by in case my realignment
unleashed a torrent of sexual energy. But your reporter made
her excuses and left - I was simply too relaxed. And he
balefully muttered something about women always preferring
massage to sex.
Later that evening, as we prepared to go out, he limped
towards me.;! think I threw my hip olit last night when I was
being a gust of air,' he winced.
I had no time for sympathy. 'Tell me,' I said, 'and be
honest. Does my base chakra look big in this?'
First published in Image magazine, October 1999.
54
"Postcards from the Bed" MArain Keyes pp52-54
The following day, I had an appointment at the Harvest Moon
Centre with Doctor Yvonne Murphy, who works in tandem
with Danielle. She's a fully qualified chiropractor of the
conventional medicine kind, but with a difference. She doesn't
just fix your gammy back, she 'realigns' your spirit as well.
Most of us are 'out of balance' - our male / female sides are
skewed or our right brain/ left brain balance is off, and once
we're back in balance, it'll 'heal sexuality and bring heightened
awareness and awake mind, body and spirit' .
The Harvest Moon Centre - like the place the night
before - was full of surprisingly normal-looking people: a
blonde woman in a black trouser-suit with an umbrella was
emerging from having her chakras realigned, a man with the
short, tight curls and meaty build of a rugby player was off to
the flotation tank for a session. He jerked his thumb towards
the tank and casually asked the receptionist, 'I'll just hop in,
will Ir'
Yvonne took me into a therapy room and within seconds
she had discovered the banjaxed bit of my neck. The top of
my spine points slightly to the right and I had always thought
it was that way because I'd got mild whiplash while on a
rollercoaster in Alton Towers. But Yvonne's assessment of it
was that my right-brain was working overtime and my leftbrain
was basically sitting around, slumped in front of the
telly, watching Oprah.
She says that our back problems are a map to our emotional
and spiritual states. Men mostly come to her with lower-back
problems, which means their base chakra - which correlates
Does My Base Chakra Look Big in This?
to survival issues like careers and finances - is giving them
gyp.
Her language, like Danielle's, is mystical - the chakra
hit-rate per sentence is high. If you were in any way sceptical
you might be moved to be scornful and Yvonne is wryly
aware that this is the case. Not that she seems to care - if you
could bottle her serenity you'd' really be on to something.
Besides, as she numbers hard-nosed business people among
her clientele, she can afford to ignore the sceptics. Accountants
and lawyers come to her to get their analytical left-brain to
stop bullying the artistic right-brain. Even more intriguingly,
greyhound and racehorse owners employ her to work on their
animals. In fact, she treats more racehorses than she does
human beings! And somehow I can't imagine the horsey set
standing for any nonsense if they weren't getting results.
Up on the couch I clambered. At the best of times I'm a
massage junkie - call it hands-on healing ( Yvonne does) or call
it massage, but I love it. With her focus on my neck, skull, face
and spine, she twiddled and rubbed me, and it was blissful.
After about twenty minutes ofpressure, she told me that my
right-brain and left-brain were more in alignment. Honesty
compels me to admit that I didn' t feel anything that I might
describe as a shift, but I didn't care. I felt so good I was ·
floating, and my only regret was that I hadn't been more out
of alignment to begin with, because the treatment would have
gone on for longer.
When I got home, Himself was waiting for me with eager
anticipation.
Postcards from the Bed
'Well?' he asked hopefully. 'Is it all systems go?'
I'd ordered him to be on stand-by in case my realignment
unleashed a torrent of sexual energy. But your reporter made
her excuses and left - I was simply too relaxed. And he
balefully muttered something about women always preferring
massage to sex.
Later that evening, as we prepared to go out, he limped
towards me.;! think I threw my hip olit last night when I was
being a gust of air,' he winced.
I had no time for sympathy. 'Tell me,' I said, 'and be
honest. Does my base chakra look big in this?'
First published in Image magazine, October 1999.
54
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